crying men

When I was listening to the radio, the host said that men often cried these days. He judges it especially when he sees many grooms crying at the wedding.

To tell the truth, my son also sometimes cries in front of me. When I was a child, I hardly cried. I was even worried once whether I would cry when my parents pass away. Now I cry soon only when I imagine it though.
I don't understand why he cries soon.
Some say that men's hearts have gotten weak, but what made them weak?
On the other hand, others say it's good to cry. Sometimes men who cry might look warm-hearted.
However I don't want my son to cry soon.
I'm thinking how can I strengthen his heart. I think it's good for him to play soccer on his team. But he loves playing DS games. Can it be considered one of the causes? Do I indulge him because of the only child?

I'll ask ex-school principal about it later.



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No title

What does your son cry about?

This is a debate in some western countries too. Women are often raised to believe that men don't have feelings, so women are often strong with their feelings on men. Especially with rejections!

Re: No title

Hello, Always visiting.

Thank you for your comment always.
He cries about trifle things such as when he wants to play but he has to study before it.
I think western people apt to express their feelings more than Japanese, so I wonder whether western men are more easily moved to tears than Japanese ones.

No title

I think the most important thing is to accomplish the mission regardless of how one feels. However, to cry in public, except in extreme circumstances, is seen by many as an attempt at sympathy seeking. I think that anything given away easily is not sacred to the person. The inner emotions of a person should be sacred...and so, not shown easily. It has to do with sincerity. Although people are different, to cry openly seen by Americans as a weakness and a lack of perspective and so, wisdom.

In general, American males do not cry easily. It is even looked down upon if they openly complain...without having tried all known solutions first. Just by judging by my stay in Japan for 1 year in 1986 - 87...in Osaka...I was shocked by the feminization of many of the young males. Many wore a kind of makeup, and had handbags...and often carried their items like females. I think that many males will do what they think the females desire (to be popular with them)... just like the desire of many of the Japanese females acting like little girls (too cutesy...sometimes sickeningly so). They are doing what they think many men like (don't get me wrong...most of both sexes did not act in this manner).

In general, tears of true sadness are ok...so long as the person tries to keep them private. Men most often express their anger in America openly...but not tears. Boys in both countries, I think, are encouraged to not show any weaknesses...as they will often be physically targeted by other males if they do...where the females will not be nearly so often.

Men...far more often than females MUST be able to work as a team with others. This involves a level of trust in the other males to not allow emotions to cloud their judgement...even momentarily. A cool composure...even in the most trying of times, earns the male respect among his peers...because they trust him to not be rattled by circumstances. This is necessary in many situations...and is one of the main attributes of leadership.

I don't understand why a male would cry at his own wedding. He should be consumed with love for his partner and with great optimism for their future together. By showing that he will be man enough to allow the woman to not have to worry about his capability to make rational decisions under pressure...it allows her to concentrate on her specialized functions in the marriage (if they are going to raise a family).

I will cut off my comment now (I tend to get too wordy). I will be looking at more of your articles...and commenting on those though :)

Re: No title

Hello, shiroi tora.

Thank you very much for your substantial comment and taking time for me.
And I remember you giving me a profitable comment for my English studying last fall. After that I made a modification on my studying although I've been lazy these days.

I understand how American men see those who cry openly and they don't cry easily. Now that you mention it, I hardly see them doing even on TV dramas or movies. I don't have time to see them very much though.
Probably you would be more shocked by the feminization of Japanese males if you come to Japan now. It is increasing that the number of 'Sosyokudanshi' or herbivore men that means the extremely opposite from masculine, as you may know. I think that the phenomenon is closely related with crying openly.

I'm pleased that my son joins a team with others at least. He usually doesn't cry in public but in front of me.
And in a timely manner, I read a newspaper article saying that it's difficult for children or teenagers to manage their emotions. So I think it may be early to worry about it now.

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Sakae

Author:Sakae
Welcome to my blog.
I'm married and we have a son. I live in Hokkaido, Japan.
I like handmade things and Ikebana(arranging flowers).
I hope that you enjoy my articles and photos.

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